Reset to Amazing Week 8: staying calm in a storm

We’re going into Week 8 (again) of our Team RLEI Reset Program to Live Amazing that restarts every 100 days. This time around we are sharing weekly tips on how you can improve your score and health numbers. (Take the Shaklee HEALTHPRINT for your wellness assessment.) Follow along and transform your health! It’s really difficult staying calm in stressful situations, isn’t it? And yet it can make all the difference in how that stress escalates and causes further damage to your health. Some times the anticipation of something stressful is enough to start making the process worse. Here are some things to keep in mind and ask yourself: 1. What’s happening in your head? Are you afraid of a particular poor outcome? Humiliation? Loss? Pain? The unknown? Loss of control? Something burdensome or annoying? Bad news? 2. What is it that you’re really worried about? How likely is that outcome? How bad would it be really? What’s the worst thing that can happen? How likely is it to go in that direction? So what if it did? How bad is that really? In your mind, the stakes might automatically be set at “disastrously high” — is that accurate, though? 3. What’s actually happening in the world? The other person isn’t a complete unknown. What are they looking for? What are they responding to? What do they need? f they’re mad or intense, what will help them feel less upset? Do they need you to listen? To act? To apologize? To reassure them? To take them seriously? 4. What assumptions are you making based on incomplete data? We often assign personal meaning to things that have no implications for us personally, or assume that a particular outcome necessarily follows something that’s really not strongly correlated. Challenge those assumptions. It’s not easy, which makes it helpful to have a calm friend to help you keep things at arm’s length. What’s really happening? What does it really mean? Meanwhile — what can you do to make things less fraught? Recognizing you’re upset/un-calm lets you re-negotiate the circumstances. Ask for time, ask for space. Communicate ahead of time to let people you work closely with know that for you, having the information in advance and having a chance to review (rather than just springing an ad hoc discussion on you) it will make meetings more productive, if that’s true for you. Have words ready to de-escalate tense situations. Try to remove emotional language and accusatory statements from your tool box. Stay on what’s real without immediately leaping to what the implications are (or might be) when you’re discussing things. Have questions ready to re-focus things in productive directions. Stay aware of how you’re feeling and what your body language is telling the other person and yourself. Your tension can compound when you feel yourself tensing up physically — concentrate on neutralizing your posture, relaxing your shoulders, avoid leaning forward, and open your hands. From “”)

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